Simplicity is Key - Holidays 2013

What is one of your favorite past-times during the holiday season? What traditions do you hold dear to your heart and carry forth each year?

My husband and I love the nights when we turn on our fireplace (electric heater - one of our best investments!), turn off the lights, and just sit on the couch enjoying each other's company while we drink hot cocoa with whipped cream and watch the tree lights twinkle against the various ornaments.
We will always do that. I can visualize us sitting together sipping cocoa in 50 years. It doesn't happen every night, but when we do take advantage of the opportunity to just stop and listen and be together in quiet, it is a glorious moment and I cherish those evenings.

My sister has some wonderful tips on her blog, Art at Dawn. And truth be told, I've incorporated several of her ideas into our lives in the past (ahem - baking cookies...). Part of the holiday season that we love and loathe at the same time is the frenzied schedules, wild decorating, incessant baking and cooking. But do we have to blindly accept this?

We're trying something new this year. We want to try to capture the same spirit of the season with less stress - less hassle - fewer moments of "I need to catch my breath." How are we attempting it, you ask? Two occasions have already presented themselves:

1. Our tree. We used to get a live tree. When Syd was old enough to pull it over, we invested in a beautiful pre-lit artificial tree that was covered in "snow." Last year, however, the "snow" caused rather severe allergic reactions in the three of us while we were putting it up and taking it down, so we decided it was time for Steve to take it to work and we would go back to our live trees. But why spend money and time on that when we had these lovelies packed away? Our three trees have been in storage for nearly 10 years. I wasn't even sure they would work. But once I started setting them up, I loved the way it looked - especially when we set up our growing village for the first time since Syd came along. This was simple to set up, Syd had a ton of fun unpacking the villagers, and the house is just as festive as it would have been with the single tree.
2. Our cookies - I love baking. It relaxes me. But when I am trying to balance home, school, laundry, cooking and baking, it can get stressful. Add in the fact that my little chef is old enough to truly help me and wants to, and things can get even more exciting! I decided that we're going to try a single type of cookie this year that allows you to choose different additives to change the flavor. And I don't mean my famous biscotti. I will miss baking my biscotti, but I am excited to try variations on my meringue, and I am looking forward to having my little helper work with me. 

I am sure there will be more opportunities and more choices to make as the season progresses. I have no doubts there will be those harried moments. But I also know that I feel more relaxed entering this season than I have in quite some time, and it is a rather enjoyable feeling to experience. 

So, as the season begins with tomorrow's Thanksgiving celebrations, what steps are you taking to ensure enjoyment in all you do? How are your plans progressing? In all the memories that filter back to my mind's eye as I think of the holidays, it is the people I remember the most - the visiting with family - and the moments of quiet that punctuate the noise that accompanies those visits. I look forward to having crowds visiting and an abundance of food, but I also look forward to the contrasting solitude and serenity that comes with a moment of silence and a mug of hot cocoa, sitting next to my wonderful husband.

Why I Decided not to Stress - Nanowrimo 2013

At the beginning of this school year, I made a vow to myself to use every spare moment - to prioritize my time - to cherish opportunities for accomplishing everything. While I have had a few set-backs, I have been far more successful in keeping up with everything. Nothing is perfect, but I feel I am more balanced and more up to date than in the past. For example, this is the first time I've ever gotten both summer reading projects for my AP kids graded within the first half of the first quarter. I have been pleased with my efforts, and vowed to keep working towards the goals I had set for myself.

November's Nano started with big expectations. I was looking forward to writing my next novel, and I felt confident as the month began. I easily sailed through the first week, building my word count up and surpassing the daily goals by 2,000 words in that first week.

The second week began and I knew I was going to have to fight to make my word count. I had a few days at school where I seemed to run at a break-neck speed. I began to fall behind. I held my ground and managed to take care of school, the house, and cater to my son, somewhat, and still catch up by writing nearly 5,000 words in one day over the weekend.

That was exhausting.

Syd is still in the habit of getting up by 5:30 on most mornings. Now that I'm no longer nursing, we've gotten into the habit of getting to bed by 10:30. On 'Mommy Nights' - days when I bathe Syd, rock and read, and put him to bed, I am usually free by 8:30. That gives me two hours to get ready for the next day, to complete school work, to straighten the house and throw a load of laundry in, and to write.

Let's be honest. Not much writing was getting done after 8pm. I am tired in the evening. It is difficult to keep everything in balance and I had faith that I could still do it all. I have a great idea for my book and it started to write itself. But then it took a very odd turn, and I struggled to make connections between where it was heading and where I wanted it to head.

But then I started feeling that same gripping, drowning feeling I've had in the past. I started to stress over not getting an opportunity to write. I started fussing at Sydney when I was trying to write and he wanted to play, or watch Mommy write, or just needed a granola bar or milk in his cup. And I felt horrible.

And my grading began to pile up. And laundry began to pile up. And my cooking/baking slackened.

Needless to say, I started to struggle to find the words to put down on paper. And I fought myself to force myself to write.

And then I wondered why.

I've accomplished this once. I know I will have more opportunities to complete this in the future. Why does it have to be THIS year? Why?

And I realized... it doesn't.

And I decided to let go. To return to the plans and vows I had made myself that were making me content. I returned to playing with my son. I returned to baking for fun. I returned to trying to keep the ever-growing/never-ending piles of laundry smaller.

And I felt peace.

So, remember, above all, "To thine own self be true," and pick your battles. Do what makes you happy for who you are, not for some random goal you feel you have to accomplish. I got halfway to the end in my Nano 2013 sprint. And I'm very happy about that. And I'm perfectly content to leave it sitting there until time and energy allow me to refocus on my writing as opposed to my other goals in life.

And most importantly - I felt peace with my decision.

This holiday season, do what makes you happy. And find your peace.

My Story - Endometriosis: Part IV - Post-Baby

My baby boy was beautiful. Perfect. Truly perfect.

He was breach, so by having a c-section, his head came out perfectly round with no pointed crown. He had flawless skin and has only started developing freckles as he's aged. He didn't have any birthmarks. He had eyes so dark it was difficult to see what color they were, but then they turned a cool gray/green. He was, and still is, beautiful.

Sydney knew what he wanted, too - his latch was unmistakable. He grew quickly and is still a big eater. I nursed him for nearly 3 years. And because he ate nothing but breastmilk for the first 7 months, the hormones to produce the milk prevented anything else from happening with my endometriosis. It was wonderful. I started to think the pregnancy had "cured" everything.

When Syd turned 7 months old and started solid food, the milk production obviously reduced. With the reduction, the pain started to return.

Over the course of the next few months, the waves of pain, discomfort, and bleeding began to increase exponentially. It was manageable while I still nursed primarily, but as Syd began eating increasing amounts of solid food, and reducing the amount of milk, the symptoms grew.

By the following August, in 2011, I was experiencing so much pain my doctor recommended we try an IUD to control the hormones and help alleviate the excruciating discomfort. During work week of the school year, I paid a visit to my doctor. And I regretted it.

We were to wait up to 3 months to make sure the hormones were working. Every month that passed, I kept hoping that "it would soon be better - by next month, I would be fine." Every month that passed got worse. And the end result of what was transpiring was a solid four-month stretch that I wouldn't wish on anyone. Here, there are details I will refrain from going into - but something had to change.

In December, I read a book that spoke of the uses of progesterone to treat any number of maladies in "aging" women - not menopausal - not perimenopausal, but premenopausal women. I was absolutely miserable. To be quite honest with you, I've shut out some memories from that time (less than a year ago) and can only say that I was ready to just get everything taken out.

At my next doctor appointment, I discussed everything - laid it all out on the table. I'm sure I was instrumental in causing her to be late with subsequent appointments, but frankly, I didn't care because I was desperate for something to change. We immediately removed the IUD and the doctor asked I keep her up to date on how my body was sorting itself out.

I fought to try to do whatever I could to help myself. I increased water consumption. I tried regular exercise. I increased natural foods - grains and fresh veggies. I tried to monitor my sleep and, even with a young one, maintain a consistent sleep schedule. Nothing worked. My body was all over the place.

Three months later, I started bleeding. Hard. And bad. I, again, will refrain from detail. But it came to a point one afternoon where I called the doctor's office on my way home and asked the nurse to do whatever she needed to do to 'fix it.' I was absolutely desperate lest my home life and my career be compromised. She called me back within 20 minutes and told me when to be at the hospital for an ablation.

Less than a week later, I had an endometrial ablation. I was very lucky in that the outpatient surgery coincided with the beginning of our spring break, so I did not miss out on any school. However, I did not get anything done for school that week, and I missed out on a lot of play time with Sydney. The end result was initially quite worth it, though.

Since the ablation, I have had absolute negligible amounts of bleeding - nearly 2 years later. The procedure rectified the weakness that accompanies loss of blood, and the loss of blood, itself, but it has done nothing to remedy the pain, the bloating, the discomfort of endometriosis, nor the cravings, the irritability, the acne, the bloating that accompany a normal menstruation cycle.

Essentially, I still have the exact same problem as before, minus the expulsion of endometrium cells. I call these my "non-period periods." In addition to my "NPPs," I also have near constant pressure on my lower abdomen and lower back pain. I can no longer sleep on my stomach as it makes my lower back ache far too much. I have trouble lecturing for too long in class because standing for extended amounts of time makes me feel like someone is squeezing me in a vise. I am miserable during our SoL testing because we are not supposed to sit - we have to be constantly moving to monitor the students as they test and these tests last for hours on end. I have to watch how I pick up my son, how I play with my son, how long I spend time doing chores around the house.

I hate this aspect of my life. I refuse to let it derail the plans I have. It sidelines me, sure, but it won't win. The problem is, I'm not even sure having a hysterectomy would rectify the situation in any manner. So, it is a game of "how much can I take before I must lie still with a heating pad." It is a constant reminder to me that I struggle to do what I should be able to do without blinking.

Photo courtesy of https://www.violetpetalstudy.com/FAQ.aspx?l=e

I know this path in my life is far from over. I just wanted to let others know where I've traveled in hopes of helping someone - anyone - who experiences the same situation. So, to all my Endo Sisters, stay strong and refuse to give in. I'm here for you.

Roasted Pumpkin Seeds

Low and slow, baby.  Low and slow.

That's the only way to succeed with one of my seasonal favorites.

I love pumpkin. I am a fiend for pumpkin. Anything and everything pumpkin. I am thankful that pumpkin is canned and I stock up during the fall. Most of my baking surrounds itself, it seems, around pumpkin - year round.

But one seasonal staple that remains seasonal is my roasted pumpkin seeds. They are healthy, delicious, and so easy to just chomp on, husk and all.

I even offer to roast any seeds my students bring in, then share them with the entire class.

Roasted Pumpkin Seeds
First, it is important to note that you need a lot of time at home to do this properly. If you've only got two hours before you have to leave for work or to go to a meeting, follow step one then stop until you have more time. Make sure you store them in the fridge, covered.

1. After you cut the top off the pumpkin, use your fingers as a sieve to scoop out the seeds. This will help tremendously in separating the 'guts' (pith?) from the seeds. I usually drop my seeds into a bowl of heavily salted water to soak and wash off the pumpkin. 
2. Preheat the oven to around 250*. I sometimes go lower, but never - NEVER go higher.
3. Using either your hand or a strainer of some sort, scoop the seeds out of the salted water onto a large rag or towel. If there are clumps of pumpkin still stuck to the seeds, separate. It certainly won't hurt to roast that as well, but the flesh turns rather dark and tough and can be a turn-off to first time seed tasters.
4. I tend to fold the towel over and do a quick rub, just to soak up any excess moisture.
5. Folding the towel in half, I create a 'spout' and pour the seeds onto a lipped sheet pan. You may have to scrape some that stick to the towel.
6. Liberally pour olive oil onto the seeds. Toss gently to coat. 
7. Sprinkle sea salt onto the seeds. 
8. Sprinkle garlic powder onto the seeds (no need for garlic salt. We're not going for a heart attack, here)
9. Toss the seeds gently, then sprinkle again.
10. Pop the pan into the oven.

I let them bake for an hour before I toss them again. Subsequently, toss them every 30 minutes. As the seeds begin to dry, they will stick to each other. Re-sprinkle with salt and garlic each time you toss them while they're still damp.

When the seeds sound like coins (they tend to clatter a bit after they've dried fully), toss them one more time and turn the oven off. Leave them in the oven overnight.

By the next morning, you have a healthy snack! My students ask if they're supposed to eat them whole or crack them like sunflower seeds. Eat them whole. They're so yummy!!

I've also tried this with cinnamon and sugar - these are just as yummy but the sugar can sometimes caramelize a bit, causing an almost 'bark-like' consistency. I would merely suggest that you toss them more frequently than every 30 minutes if you're going for a sweet treat.

Gasping for Breath

I cannot believe I haven't blogged since the end of August. I think that speaks to what has been happening in my life more than any other explanation I can possibly offer.

Most recently, and quite enjoyably, we housed 2 French exchange students. My boys were a lot of fun and they definitely made an impression on my family. The house still feels empty without them. Sydney still asks after them. They just left us yesterday and we're already eager for a chance to see them again.

I am hoping "Life," in all its vast unknown, will bless me with the normal hectic frenzied craziness that this time of year brings us.

We're beginning our new batch of SoL testing starting tomorrow - My thoughts have turned to the students we are trying to help through the state-mandated testing so they can enjoy the remainder of their education and graduate on time to the hoots and hollering of parents and family and friends in a crowded, hot arena.

Life is for the taking, and sleep is for when I've succumbed to some disastrous illness, so I'll plunge on and do what I can to help anyone I can. Let's just hope Syd is able to make it through his 2nd year of public school relatively unscathed. :-)

Oatmeal Cut-Out Cookies - Dinosaurs and #4s

Syd's 4th birthday is just around the corner, and I have a quite a bit of fun experimenting on cheap but fun ways to make it entertaining. You can see many of the activities I did over the summer and am planning for his birthday on my Pinterest board here. But the most recent addition to the 'dance of experimentation' was the Oatmeal (a.k.a., healthier than store-bought) Cut-Out Cookies.

The first time I made these, Syd was about 18 months old, and none of us liked them, much. I honestly do not recall where I found the recipe. It was handwritten in his book, so I'm going to assume I copied it hastily out of a magazine. Regardless, they were rather flavorless. However, they did cut out well. That's a bonus, right?

Since Syd's birthday theme is dinosaurs, I thought it would be wonderful to have a simple cookie to go along with his festivities. Bonus - after tweaking the recipe, he wolfed them down, so I think I may have a winner. I was tempted to purchase a dinosaur cutter, but then realized I had his sandwich cutter that made 2 dinosaurs out of his grilled cheese. Problem solved! I did, however, buy a #4 cutter to accompany his brachiosaurus cookies.

Oatmeal Cut-Out Cookies

Preheat the oven to 375* (I think this is a little hot; I went to 350*)
1 cup unsalted butter - (I usually let mine sit out, but I've also found that 15 seconds in the microwave on half-power does the trick nicely.)
1 1/2 cups sugar

Blend these together well until fluffy.

Whisk the dry ingredients together while this blends:

3 cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp salt (I used more - probably 1 1/4 tsp - and I used a coarser salt than the regular table salt - it added a subtle but nice surprise every once in awhile as you bit into the cookies that blended well with the sweetness.)
1 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp baking powder
Cinnamon - (I'm a nut for cinnamon, so I don't measure. I dump some in and after I've whisked the dry ingredients together, I smell them. If I can't smell cinnamon, I add more. Simple enough. You need to measure to your own taste.)

After the butter is fluffy and the dry ingredients are whisked well:

2 eggs - beat these into the sugar mixture well, one at a time, incorporating each egg well.
1 Tbsp vanilla - (I love vanilla, too - I used vanilla paste instead of extract. Yes, that says Tablespoon - think about all the absorbing ingredients - flour and oatmeal? It needs the extra punch.)

Slowly add the dry ingredients to the wet, mixing well. Afterwards, add in 2 cups of dry oatmeal, folding this in by hand.

Roll the dough to 1/4" and cut-out. Spread on prepared (greased - blech - I used parchment paper) pans. Bake at 350-375* for around 10 minutes or until lightly brown.

These were test cookies - I plan to add icing to the top for Syd's birthday so the 4 looks like a 4. And this is the only dinosaur that survived, so it looks a little sad, but the sandwich cutter worked very well. Either way, these are yummy! I hope you enjoy!

Cannonball! Jumping in to School Year 2013-2014

I am excited for this new year. It is impossible to enter into the new year without reservations regarding certain issues, topics, etc., but I honestly feel more prepared for this year than I think I ever have, and it is a very satisfying feeling to possess.

This will be short - I merely wanted to touch base and let you know that I've been busy with school, which is why I haven't blogged recently.

1. I've been reading 3 books to help administration with work week lessons for the teachers - sort of like an inservice. Drive - by Daniel Pink, was a fascinating read about what motivates us and how we need to start intrinsically motivating our students to succeed rather than tempting them with Shrute Bucks. :-) (This is a video that explains, perfectly, how we tend to withdraw from extrinsic motivators.)
2. I also read through Flip Your Classroom, by Jonathan Bergmann and Aaron Sams. This will revolutionize the classrooms as children know it if we are able to institute this everywhere. Essentially, the students watch videos the teachers produce that explains the lesson (what would normally be done in class) for homework. Then, when they come into class the next day, they do the practice (what would normally be the homework) and are thus able to get more help from the teachers as needed, rather than.. ahem... throwing their Algebra book across the room at 11 at night and waking up their Mom who wants to know why they're still up and what's wrong before they burst into tears because it just doesn't make any sense. Yeah - I vote to help keep kids from having to do that.
3. Last, I was involved in a group that explored Project Based Learning, produced through the Buck Institute. I am astounded by the idea. I am terrified, yet enthralled by this idea. Watch this video about Sammamish High School in Washington. I cannot fathom how to incorporate this into my AP class, but I definitely want to try with my 9th grade class. 

The point to these three books is that I feel a revolution coming, and it starts in my own curriculum. I'll keep you posted as things progress!